Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Boy or Girl?
Through years of infertility, there were easier times for us, and there were harder times. One of the hardest times I can think of what about a year into trying, when all of our friends were expecting their first babies. It seemed like everywhere we went, people were announcing. We were afraid to bump into friends, get on Facebook, or pretty much do anything that involved getting out of bed. By four years in of trying, friends were beginning to have their second (or third, or fourth!!!) babies and we were praying for IVF to work. IVF #1 gave us plenty of angels, but no baby for our arms. I wanted to give up. I wanted to crawl into bed again while another season of blossoming women danced around me. It hurt so badly to see their growing tummies. Walter told me I would regret it if we didn't try IVF again. He was right. So we did.
Now I'm a mommy with a (definitely!) growing tummy and I struggle on when to flaunt with pride and when to suck in with sensitivity. I pray that I'm making the right decisions daily.
I just got home from making reservations for our Gender Reveal party on November 12th.
The thought of soon knowing if we will have a little baby girl or a little baby boy makes me lose my breath for a minute. I've said if before, but I am so glad that I don't get to choose! I would never be able to make a decision.
I can see Walter being the protective daddy of a beautiful little girl with big brown eyes like him. I can imagine the bows, and the dresses, and the tea parties... I'm afraid to think of boyfriends, those scary teenager years, and the clothing fights. Walter dreams of daddy-daughter dates... but he says he'll never be ready for her to date either. We have a name picked out for her, and are ready to buy pink tutus and add lots of sparkle to the nursery.
I can imagine a little boy running around here, trying to ride the pups. He'll have lots of Walter's sandy hair and possibly my eyes. We'll make messes together, splash in mud puddles, and make fart jokes. Walter is excited because he'll 'know what to do with boys' and be 'less intimated' by diapering. Haha. I told Walter I'll take him on mommy-son dates... and he said it's best if I don't call them that. :) We'll go for a 'burger after practice'. I'm afraid of the energy boys can have, and how they soon outgrow hugs and kisses. We have a name picked out for him, and we're ready to fill the room with dinosaur toys (per Walter's request).
I've been keeping an eye on a few of my friends on Facebook who are pregnant right now to seem if there is a 'trend' in the genders right now.
So far my friend Liz, who has a girl, has announced she's having another (surely beautiful) girl!
My friend Katie, who already has an adorable little boy, announced he's going to have a baby brother!
My friend Erika, already with a little sweet girl in tow, is going to have another little girl for the other arm!
Elise, who has filled her family with a boy, and a girl, and another boy... is having another girl!
Leah, another good friend of mine, is now 39 weeks pregnant. Her husband, daughter, and her are anxious to see what the baby is! What a trooper to wait until finding out at birth!
So what will baby Wallheimer be?
It doesn't matter. He/she will be so loved and so long awaited.
We continue to pray everyday for those trying to conceive, but we have faith that with God on their side and a fierce determination they will soon find themselves in our place.
We pray for all the woman who are pregnant to have a smooth sailing and healthy pregnancy, because we know the alternative is painful.